BrTom - Almighty Father, we come before you joyfully! We thank you for allowing us, through Yahshua, to enter into your presence. Please forgive our sin and our uncleanness.
BrTom - Father, we wish you GOOD SABBATH ! !
BrTom - May your Sabbath be filled with joy at your children walking in your truth!
BrTom - Father, please send your spirit to guide us this evening.
BrTom - Let your words enter our hearts.
BrTom - Let us not just learn but also change our direction according to your word.
BrTom - Help us Father.
BrTom - Guide us and teach us.
BrTom - Give the 'speaker' your words for us.
BrTom - Give each person who reads these words a blessing in their spirit.
BrTom - Thank you so much, dear Father...
BrTom - Thank you for all the blessings you give...
BrTom - Our homes and families,
BrTom - our brethren here and throughout the world -
BrTom - even those we don't know.
BrTom - Thank you for your written word and
BrTom - 'for your word made flesh - Yahshua our Savior, the anointed one.
BrTom - It is in his name that we ask all these things and bring our praise to you.
BrTom - HalleluYah ! ! !
The last few weeks, I have been sharing a series of studies on the home. To this point, I have shared studies discussing the scriptural roles of Fathers, Husbands and Mothers.
Tonight I will be sharing a study on the role of Wives.
With this message I will be daring to step into territory that few ministers are willing to go.
I know that as a result of this message, I will not be winning the popularity contest, but the alternative is to water down the truth.
Watering down the truth isn't a characteristic I want to be responsible for on the day of judgment.
In this modern day, where the so called "women's liberation movement" has won the hearts of many, women have taken on responsibilities and duties that go beyond what Yahweh ever intended.
Yahweh created men and women, each to fulfill a distinct purpose and role in life. For example, men cannot bear or nurse children and women do not have the physical strength to do some of the work that men can do.
Let's examine the creation account to learn more about the will of Yahweh for woman:
Genesis 2:18 - And YAHWEH Elohim said, It is not good that the man should be alone; I will make him an help meet for him.We see that Yahweh concluded it was not good for man to be alone. Therefore, we could conclude that one of the purposes for creating woman was to be a companion.
Secondly, we learn that Yahweh desired to make a suitable helper for Adam. Therefore, being a helper for Adam is one of the purposes Yahweh had for creating her.
We read later that Yahweh created woman from man:
Genesis 2:21 - And YAHWEH Elohim caused a deep sleep to fall upon Adam and he slept: and he took one of his ribs, and closed up the flesh instead thereof;
Genesis 2:22 - And the rib, which YAHWEH Elohim had taken from man, made he a woman, and brought her unto the man.
Genesis 2:23 - And Adam said, This is now bone of my bones, and flesh of my flesh: she shall be called Woman, because she was taken out of Man.
Genesis 2:24 - Therefore shall a man leave his father and his mother, and shall cleave unto his wife: and they shall be one flesh.So woman was created and brought to Adam. In one moment, she did not exist. In the next moment, she was alive brought to Adam to be a help to him.
Do you think that she had any problem getting in her place?
But many women today have totally lost this concept. Many women have rebelled against the very thing they were created to do. Rather than being a 'helper' for their husbands, they are often an opponent and stumbling block to his success.
What needs to happen is a change in perspective.
A completely different outlook. One that sets aside the way we are raised, the way society says things should be and looks solely to Yahweh and His word for instruction on the right perspective.
As we did last week when we looked into the scriptural concepts of Motherhood and the role of women at home, we need to do so with understanding the will of Yahweh for wives and how they relate to their husbands.
A helper is one who serves another
Even Yahushua came to server
Serve
Matthew 20:28 - Even as the Son of man came not to be ministered unto, but to minister, and to give his life a ransom for many.Her role is to serve and help her husband
Yet, scripture is quite clear that wives are to be the submissive partner in a marriage:
Colossians 3:18 - Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as it is fit in the Master.It is the correct and fitting thing to do. It is part of the duty and role of a wife
But how extensive is it to be? Is it just in the major decisions that are made or is it in every single little thing?
Let's examine:
Ephesians 5:22 - Wives, submit to your own husbands, as to Yahushua.
Ephesians 5:23 - For the husband is head of the wife, as also the Messiah is head of the church; and He is the Savior of the body.
Ephesians 5:24 - Therefore, just as the assemblyis subject to the Messiah, so let the wives be to their own husbands in everything.Submit, as unto Messiah? In every thing?
Yes, this is what the scriptures teach. A wife should be submissive to her husband as if she is submitting to Messiah Himself.
We know that Yahweh desires us to submit to His will in everything, even the small things. Even so, a wife should submit to her husband in everything, including the small things.
Whether he says, "Let's do it this way" or "Please go and get my shoes", she should treat it as a command from Yahweh.
It should be done cheerfully and without complaining or even a hint of displeasure. Perhaps this seems silly and trite to some, but we need to remember that our actions are not only on display before Yahweh, but also in front of our children.
Because the relationship of the wife and husband is a mirror of the relationship of the assembly and the Messiah, she is setting the example to the children of how wonderful and blessed it is to be obedient to the Messiah when she is being obedient to her husband.
If she has any hint of rebellion or resentment at what the husbands speaks, believes, requests or demands, she is teaching her children how to be rebellious by her example.
My children are not raised, therefore I am not an authority on child training. But those whom I have learned from who have successfully raised children tell me that half the battle is in the husband and wife having the right relationship.
If the husband is cruel, harsh and easily angered, this is how the often children will view Yahweh.
If the wife is proud, rebellious, treats her husband like he is a fool, they will have a far greater difficulty submitting to Yahweh properly, if they ever even have a desire to.
Will our children say to themselves when they are raised, "Wow, I want to have a home like my Mother and Father did!" or will they say "Wow, am I ever glad to get out of that place!" ?
Much of that hinges on the husband and wife's relationship. I believe that this is why some families seem to raise righteous and well balanced children with seemingly little effort, while other families that pour all of their energies into raising their children find them rebelling later in life. O, how important this is!
But to what extent does the husband have authority over his wife?
Let's see what the Torah says:
Numbers 30:1 - And Moses spake unto the heads of the tribes concerning the children of Israel, saying, This is the thing which YAHWEH hath commanded.
Numbers 30:2 - If a man vow a vow unto YAHWEH, or swear an oath to bind his soul with a bond; he shall not break his word, he shall do according to all that proceedeth out of his mouth.
Numbers 30:3 - If a woman also vow a vow unto YAHWEH, and bind herself by a bond, being in her father's house in her youth;
Numbers 30:4 - And her father hear her vow, and her bond wherewith she hath bound her soul, and her father shall hold his peace at her: then all her vows shall stand, and every bond wherewith she hath bound her soul shall stand.
Numbers 30:5 - But if her father disallow her in the day that he heareth; not any of her vows, or of her bonds wherewith she hath bound her soul, shall stand: and YAHWEH shall forgive her, because her father disallowed her.
Numbers 30:6 - And if she had at all an husband, when she vowed, or uttered ought out of her lips, wherewith she bound her soul;
Numbers 30:7 - And her husband heard it, and held his peace at her in the day that he heard it: then her vows shall stand, and her bonds wherewith she bound her soul shall stand.
Numbers 30:8 - But if her husband disallowed her on the day that he heard it; then he shall make her vow which she vowed, and that which she uttered with her lips, wherewith she bound her soul, of none effect: and YAHWEH shall forgive her.Here we see that the husband's authority even extends to his wife's speech.
He can even annul a vow that she has spoken, make it to no effect in the eyes of Yahweh and Yahweh will accept it!
His authority appears to be equal to that of a Father over his daughter. This may be difficult for many to accept, but it is true and it is right there in the word of Yahweh.
This is so far from the way of the world today! Yet, there is nothing new under the sun:
Isaiah 3:12 - As for my people, children are their oppressors, and women rule over them. O my people, they which lead thee cause thee to err, and destroy the way of thy paths.Sisters, it is time for a change in perspective. A perspective that is in unity with the word of Yahweh.
Don't let the enemy lie to you, there is freedom in the ways of Yahweh!
To the world, all of our obedience looks like bondage, but we know how much it sets us free.
It isn't bondage at all, it is way of Yahweh! The ways of Yahweh are truth, light and love. It is the enemies of Yahweh that call it bondage:
1John 5:2 - By this we know that we love the children of YAHWEH, when we love YAHWEH and keep His commandments.
1John 5:3 - For this is the love of YAHWEH, that we keep His commandments. And His commandments are not burdensome.It is rebellion that is in the heart of Satan. It is written:
Isaiah 14:12 - How art thou fallen from heaven, O Lucifer, son of the morning! how art thou cut down to the ground, which didst weaken the nations!
Isaiah 14:13 - For thou hast said in thine heart, I will ascend into heaven, I will exalt my throne above the stars of El: I will sit also upon the mount of the congregation, in the sides of the north:
Isaiah 14:14 - I will ascend above the heights of the clouds; I will be like the most High.He wanted to be like the Most High!
And still does!
Isaiah 14:15 - Yet thou shalt be brought down to hell, to the sides of the pit.Rebellion against Yahweh's authority is Satan's desire.
He wanted to be exalted and in the position of the one to whom he had to submit. He wanted to be 'like the Most High'.
The women who want to lead, and aspire to be like their husbands in matters of authority are not following Yahweh's leading, but rather the desire and leading of Yahweh's enemy!
This is very dangerous ground for a wife to tread. Eve (Chawwah) apparently had the same aspirations in the garden of Eden, to be like Elohim knowing good and evil.
Satan fed her these aspirations:
Genesis 3:4 - And the serpent said unto the woman, Ye shall not surely die:
Genesis 3:5 - For Elohim doth know that in the day ye eat thereof, then your eyes shall be opened, and ye shall be like Elohim, knowing good and evil.She chose to eat the fruit, to be like the Most High.
Women must be on guard against this form of Rebellion! There are many forms of it. One of them is contentiousness:
Proverbs 21:19 - It is better to dwell in the wilderness, than with a contentious and an angry woman.Let it not be so among the sisters in the faith. If a woman should be submissive to her husband as unto Yahweh, then her contentiousness is also like contending with Yahweh:
Isaiah 45:9 - Woe unto him that striveth with his Maker! Let the potsherd strive with the potsherds of the earth. Shall the clay say to him that fashioneth it, What makest thou? or thy work, He hath no hands?Yahweh has placed the husbands in the position of authority over the wives, not unlike Yahweh placed Moshe in the position of authority over the children of Israel.
In every case that the children of Israel spoke against Moshe, Yahweh viewed it as murmuring against Him.
Let's examine what took place to the children of Israel who spoke against one in authority over them:
Numbers 16:1 - Now Korah, the son of Izhar, the son of Kohath, the son of Levi, and Dathan and Abiram, the sons of Eliab, and On, the son of Peleth, sons of Reuben, took men:
Numbers 16:2 - And they rose up before Moses, with certain of the children of Israel, two hundred and fifty princes of the assembly, famous in the congregation, men of renown:
Numbers 16:3 - And they gathered themselves together against Moses and against _aron, and said unto them, Ye take too much upon you, seeing all the congregation are holy, every one of them, and YAHWEH is among them: wherefore then lift ye up yourselves above the congregation of YAHWEH?
Numbers 16:4 - And when Moses heard it, he fell upon his face:And what did Yahweh later do with those that stood up against Moshe?
Numbers 16:31 - And it came to pass, as he had made an end of speaking all these words, that the ground clave asunder that was under them:
Numbers 16:32 - And the earth opened her mouth, and swallowed them up, and their houses, and all the men that appertained unto Korah, and all their goods.
Numbers 16:33 - They, and all that appertained to them, went down alive into the pit, and the earth closed upon them: and they perished from among the congregation.You would think that people would repent at this event? But we read later that:
Numbers 16:41 - But on the morrow all the congregation of the children of Israel murmured against Moses and against Aaron, saying, Ye have killed the people of YAHWEH.There was seemingly no end to their rebellion.
Yahweh expected that The children of Israel were to respect Moshe's authority as unto Yahweh and not murmur or complain against him.
This does not mean that Moshe WAS Yahweh but it does mean that any authority that is from Yahweh is to be obeyed and respected as unto Yahweh:
Romans 13:1 - Let every soul be subject unto the higher powers. For there is no power but of YAHWEH: the powers that be are ordained of YAHWEH.
Romans 13:2 - Whosoever therefore resisteth the power, resisteth the ordinance of YAHWEH: and they that resist shall receive to themselves damnation.The principles of authority is the same.
This does not mean that the husband is greater than the wife in any way, shape or form. It doesn't mean that he is her spiritual superior. In fact:
Galatians 3:28 - There is neither Jew nor Greek, there is neither slave nor free, there is neither male nor female; for you are all one in the Messiah Yahushua.Some take this verse to the extreme, but surely this doesn't mean that men now need to find a way to bear and nurse children, since there is neither male nor female in the Messiah Yahushua!
Every husband and every wife has a certain role to fulfill before Yahweh. A role that they were created to accomplish.
This is where Yahweh has placed each, and there should be no grumbling and complaining by any spouse concerning what duty Yahweh has given us!
We need to not only respect, but LOVE the calling we are given and love Yahweh's will for our lives. Enjoy the blessing of Yahweh!
Wives, you can be the crown of your husband or rottenness in his bones:
Proverbs 12:4 - A virtuous woman is a crown to her husband: but she that maketh ashamed is as rottenness in his bones.It is all your choice. Your husband needs to fulfill his role too, but he can only do so much:
Proverbs 27:15 - A continual dropping in a very rainy day and a contentious woman are alike.
Proverbs 27:16 - Whosoever hideth her hideth the wind, and the ointment of his right hand, which bewrayeth itself.Therefore, the choice is yours to make. But I say, use discretion and fear Yahweh!
Proverbs 11:22 - As a jewel of gold in a swine's snout, so is a fair woman which is without discretion.
Proverbs 31:30 - Favour is deceitful, and beauty is vain: but a woman that feareth YAHWEH, she shall be praised.It is Yahweh that we all should fear. But too often, a fear of circumstances, a fear that the wrong decision will be made, and a fear of what the future may hold controls her life and prevents her from trusting.
But Yahweh says to be in subjection, even if a man doesn't obey the word:
1Peter 3:1 - Wives, likewise, [be] submissive to your own husbands, that even if some do not obey the word, they, without a word, may be won by the conduct of their wives,
1Peter 3:2 - when they observe your chaste conduct accompanied by fear.Notice that it isn't the constant complaining or wearing down that makes needed changes in a husband's life, but the quiet, chaste conversation of the wife, coupled with a genuine fear of Yahweh.
Righteous examples are more convincing than many words.
Above all, take those things that disturb you to Yahweh who can bring about the changes you desire.
When a thought against your husband enters your mind and you know it is a wrong thought, pray IMMEDIATELY that Yahweh will take the thought away and ask Him to take that thought captive and cast it far from you, never to return. It is the same enemy that sought to lead Eve (Chawwah) astray:
2Corinthians 10:3 - For though we walk in the flesh, we do not war according to the flesh,
2Corinthians 10:4 - for the weapons of our warfare are not of the flesh, but divinely powerful for the destruction of fortresses.
2Corinthians 10:5 - Destroying speculations and every lofty thing raised up against the knowledge of YAHWEH, taking every thought captive to the obedience of the Messiah,
2Corinthians 10:6 - and we are ready to punish all disobedience, whenever your obedience is complete.This is relying on the strength of Yahweh to overcome.
Rather than badgering your husband about the things you do not like, tell him how much you appreciate the things he does and let him know that you support him in whatever decisions he makes.
Remember that any correction you provide him should be done in extreme humility, even if he feels the humility is unnecessary.
If he corrects himself due to your admonitions, any correcting he does will likely be (in his mind) just because you (the leader) told him to do it.
It is good to avoid this situation and it's important that he has the freedom to hear from Yahweh. Therefore, take things to Yahweh in abundance.
But if he asks you for advice, then speak.
Many wives I know have great testimonies of what Yahweh does when she takes things to Him. He can do such a better job!
How can a wife convince her husband to be obedient to the word if she is blaspheming the word of Yahweh while trying to convince Him?
Titus 2:3 - The aged women likewise, that they be in behaviour as becometh holiness, not false accusers, not given to much wine, teachers of good things;
Titus 2:4 - That they may teach the young women to be sober, to love their husbands, to love their children,
Titus 2:5 - To be discreet, chaste, keepers at home, good, obedient to their own husbands, that the word of YAHWEH be not blasphemed.We see that a disobedient wife who claims to love Yahweh brings about reproach on Yahweh's word.
The best thing you can do to help your husband be a spiritual leader is to refrain from getting in the way!
Many women desire that their husband be the kind of leader that Yahweh wants them to be, but they are the ones preventing that from becoming a reality.
Wives can "support" their leader, but to "lead their husband to be a leader" is impossible because she is the one doing the leading!
Continuing in 1 Kepha/Peter:
1Peter 3:3 - Do not let your adornment be merely outward--arranging the hair, wearing gold, or putting on fine apparel--
1Peter 3:4 - rather let it be the hidden person of the heart, with the incorruptible beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is very precious in the sight of YAHWEH.
1Peter 3:5 - For in this manner, in former times, the holy women who trusted in YAHWEH also adorned themselves, being submissive to their own husbands,
1Peter 3:6 - as Sarah obeyed Abraham, calling him master, whose daughters you are if you do good and are not afraid with any terror.Sarah is given as an example of a submissive wife who adorned herself with a meek and quiet spirit.
The holy women of old adorned themselves with humility and subjections to their own husbands. Do you desire to be a daughter of Sarah?
You must do well and not fear. You must fear Yahweh, but you must not fear what will happen if you allow your husband to lead. It isn't about trusting in man, it's about trusting in Yahweh as verse 1Peter 3:5 said. Therefore:
Proverbs 3:5 - Trust in YAHWEH with all thine heart; and lean not unto thine own understanding.This is what the holy women of old had as their adornment. The foolish women were not so, Job's wife was a woman who prompted her husband to do evil:
Job 2:9 - Then said his wife unto him, Dost thou still retain thine integrity? curse Elohim, and die.The Septuagint, a Greek translation of the scriptures that predate the Masoretic Text has in this verse:
Job 2:9 And when much time had passed, his wife said to him, How long wilt thou hold out, saying, Behold, I wait yet a little while, expecting the hope of my deliverance? for, behold, thy memorial is abolished from the earth, even thy sons and daughters, the pangs and pains of my womb which I bore in vain with sorrows; and thou thyself sittest down to spend the nights in the open air among the corruption of worms, and I am a wandererSo the Septuagint records a more detailed description of what took place here. If this is true, she was quite contentious and really did a sales pitch for forsaking Yahweh.
If true, it is obvious that her mind was on the temporal things of this world rather than on believing and trusting in Yahweh. But Job refused to allow circumstances, whether good or evil, allow him to forsake Yahweh.
This is what needs to be done, trust Yahweh, acknowledge Him in all our ways, and He will direct our paths:
Proverbs 3:5 - Trust in YAHWEH with all thine heart; and lean not unto thine own understanding.
Proverbs 3:6 - In all thy ways acknowledge him, and he shall direct thy paths.
Proverbs 3:7 - Be not wise in thine own eyes: fear YAHWEH, and depart from evil.
Proverbs 3:8 - It shall be health to thy navel, and marrow to thy bones.Consider for a moment the great blessing is in the home of a wife who heeds these words.
She can truly be the gift from Yahweh to your husband that she is created to be:
Proverbs 19:14 - House and riches are the inheritance of fathers and a prudent wife is from YAHWEH.
James 1:17 - Every good gift and every perfect gift is from above, and comes down from the Father of lights, with whom there is no variation or shadow of turning.She can rest, knowing that she is in good hands, the hands of Yahweh.
Because she is no longer in opposition to the authority Yahweh created, she can know and believe that Yahweh will take care of her.
This is freedom. Freedom from worry because she is in Yahweh's hands. Freedom from strife in the home because she is no longer in opposition to her husband and her children follow that example of submission to authority. Freedom from having the weight of the world on her shoulders
I call on wives to enter in.
Enter in this place of freedom where there is true shalom/peace and happiness. The place where Yahweh created a wife to be. The place of eternal life.
In conclusion, I realize that there are many other areas that are worthy of consideration when examining the roles of Fathers, husbands, mothers and wives, but the things I have shared are some of the most common areas where people fall short in the home.
One thing is certain: we need to get beyond the blame game, wives blaming their husbands and husbands blaming their wives. There is plenty of blame to go around for failures in the home.
Therefore, I have a challenge, that none of us read this message thinking about how our spouses need to change in this area or that.
Let's ponder the things written herein with the thoughts of things that WE need to change. Once we have made the change, it will create the best environment for the other one to change.
None of us will be able to stand before Yahweh and blame the other for any failure in their role.
Adam tried it and it didn't work at all.
Men will not be able to stand before Yahweh and say "I didn't honor and care for her like I should because she did this and that".
Women will not be able to stand before Yahweh and say "I didn't submit to my husband because he did this and that".
Yahweh will examine each of our works in light of His word. He will judge whether it was good or evil and each one of us will need to answer for it.
Ecclesiastes 12:13 - Let us hear the conclusion of the whole matter: Fear Elohim, and keep his commandments: for this is the whole duty of man.With Yahweh's strength, a mighty work can be done in our homes!
Let's not forget the vision, the desire to bring our children up in righteousness
But let's rely on His strength, for only then can we do it.
Psalms 109:26 - Help me, O YAHWEH my Elohim: O save me according to thy mercy:
Psalms 109:27 - That they may know that this is thy hand; that thou, YAHWEH, hast done it.
Psalms 115:1 - Not unto us, O YAHWEH, not unto us, but unto thy name give glory, for thy mercy, and for thy truth's sake.Please bring your children next week. I plan to have a special study just for them, to turn their hearts to their fathers. It is time to restore!
May Yahweh bless you all!
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